Relationships fail and break, we form new ones, sometimes we dont but it is pertinent to keep moving and do not let the past experience deter you.
They’re so many factors that determine the longetivity of a relationship. Reasons why a relationship can fail may include incompatibility or a really big fight which cannot be overlooked.
When forming new relationships, most people are scared to talk about their past, not for any ulterior motives but for the fear of being dumped, left heartbroken or judged wrongly.
While for some its an innocent decision, some other people have sinister reasons, they want to continue with the perfect picture they’ve painted or they want their new partner to be decieved into believing the notion that they’re wonderful people.
However while making decisons , you must put your partner in your shoes and ask if reverse was the case would i be happy?
Should i fill them in on my past or should i let it go has been bone of contention for starting relationships, while some are of the opinion that you should let the past be the past, some are all for Transparency.
There are mainly two takes on how this can go. Speaking with two different people we discovered there are conflicting opinion.
Mr A said;
“i prefer you state whatever happened, if it was your fault, state it and
If the person truly loves you he would understand.
The first thing he/she would do is to notice that you are extremely accountable and that is rare, and a crown no responsible person will opt out for.
Anyone who thinks your past is shit because you admitted you made a mistake is trash for you. If they move on because they can’t deal, its not a big issue either, it means it wasn’t meant to happen.
Talking about who you are is far better than finding out from other people or by ourselves in most cases. Our problems and mistakes are the beautiful side of us.
We are to be proud of our mistakes in a sense we take it up like a mat, role it on our shoulders and move on. This is the experience in life”.
While Mrs B said;
“Its best that what happened in the past stays in the past.
Cause the person you’re dating may not have the maturity to discern that you’re no longer like that that is if you “changed”.
Most times they use your past against you, and judge you with it already before the relationship even starts. So its best you just say “it just didnt work out” Or “we were both at fault”.
After analyzing the both answers that were given above, I’m of the opinion that you should understand the kind of partners you have.
Some partners will rather not know anything about your past, they prefer everything to stay in the past, while some other people will go wild for keeping them in the dark.
Choose whatever works for you, what applies for your neighbor may not work for you. Just follow your intuition, it always knows the right thing to do.
What’s your take on this?.